A Power That Can Move Mountains

Television actor Ram Kapoor, interview in Delhi says, “After 20 years of smoking I quit smoking overnight. From 40 cigarettes to zero, only because my daughter said to me, ‘Dada, you want to die. You want to leave me.’ It has been one year, three months since i stopped smoking.”

Ram Kapoor was addicted to smoking and under normal circumstances it was not possible for him to overcome his addiction. But one sentence from his beloved daughter had shaken him and a strong will power emerged in him. And when there is strong will power, nothing can stand before it, neither habit nor addiction or anything else.

Often people say that they cannot give up a habit. For example, they say, i cannot stop being angry, or i cannot prevent myself from becoming tense, or i cannot stop hating others, or i cannot agree to humble myself before another, for example.

All this is not because it is impossible for the person in question to do these things. The real reason is that he is not serious about developing strong will power. If he developed strong will power, he would be able to give up any habit in the same way Ram Kapoor overcame his desire to smoke.

There are two kinds of strong will power—emotion-based and reason-based. There are many people who are motivated by an emotional moment and so abandon their habit. But it is better to abandon something on the basis of reason: a person should think and apply reason to his behaviour, then give up his habit as the result of a well-considered decision.

For example, people often develop complaints about others and go on living in the complaint culture. The habit of complaining is an issue of reason and not of emotion. That is, if a person just thinks about it, he will realise that to go on complaining means being a bad member of society. A good member is one who wishes others well. This kind of thinking is possible through rational analysis. If a person thinks in this manner, he will surely develop strong will power and instantly abandon the complaint culture.

I once met a person who told me that he used to constantly feel angry with others. One day he thought that although he was the one who was angry with others, it was actually he who paid the price for this because he constantly lived in a state of tension and stress. When he realised this, he instantly took the decision to change his attitude and stop being angry.

It is commonly seen that people easily develop strong will power for their own personal interests, but where it concerns another’s interests, they do not do so. Such a person lives by double standards. If he uses his reason and recognises this as a weakness, then surely he will develop strong will power and will abandon his wrong habit.

Often after marriage rifts develop between husband and wife and then their married life is filled with bitterness. If both were to reflect that if, after marriage, they could not live in the same happy way as before marriage, it was because they had been living with their own family members with whom they had a blood relationship: now there was no such relation. Once they acknowledge this they would be able to summon the will power to correct their behaviour and so manage to lead a normal happy married life.

Develop strong will power and you will certainly be able to move mountains.

A Message to Those Who Think They’re Too Old to Get Busy Living

I don’t understand it when people think it’s too late to make changes in their life and start living their life the way they want.

Is there a rule that I missed that says after we reach a certain age, that we’re stuck with our life the way it is?

Someone who’s 35 might feel like it’s too late while another person is 55 and feel it’s too late. That just proves that it doesn’t matter your age. It’s your perception.

Don’t you think the person who’s 55 will wish they were 35? They’ll wish they could go back 20 years and go after their dreams or change how their life is.

Thinking it’s too late to get a life that you want is one of the biggest myths holding you back in life.

The only time it is too late to do anything is when you’re physically not here anymore. Until then, don’t waste this only chance at life that you have.

If I compared myself to my friends, I was way behind. By the time we turned, 30 they had good jobs, got married, and even had kids. I was lost, confused, lonely, and unhappy.

I’ve always been a late bloomer. I didn’t get married till I was 34. I didn’t achieve my dream of being my own boss till I was 36. I’m 37 and still don’t have kids yet.

Do I wish I was 27 and living the life I am now? Absolutely, but when I was 27 I was still young and naive about life. I didn’t know what I know now.

When I turned 30, reality hit me. I had nothing to show for in life. I was unhappier at 30 than when I was 20. It wasn’t supposed to be like that. Instead of giving up, I made a promise to myself that my 30’s would be the best decade yet. I still have three years till 40, but I’ve done a pretty good job so far.

I could have thought I’m a loser at 30 for not knowing what I want to do in life. I could have continued to feel sorry for myself and wish I could go back and do things differently.

Sure there are some limitation as to when it’s too late to do something. If it requires physical talents like being a world class tennis player or soccer player, then it’s too late. It doesn’t mean I can’t start to learn how to play tennis or soccer. I could still find ways to compete.

If I wanted to learn the guitar and be good enough to perform, I could start to learn now at the age of 37. If I practiced just 30 minutes a day for a year, I would improve so much.

A guy went from a recreational table tennis to being ranked in the top 250 in England after playing every day for a year . What could you achieve if you did something every single day?

Other than physical limitations, most everything else has no expiration date. Who says you can’t go back to college now and get a degree? Just because your classmates could be old enough to be your child doesn’t mean you can’t go back.

Who says you can’t be an actor at any age? Watch movies and television shows, and you’ll see actors of all ages.

Do you have a book inside of you that you’ve wanted to write? Nobody wonders how old the author is being buying a book. In fact, nowhere inside of the book reveals the author’s age.

Want to start your own business? I read somewhere once that the older you are when you start your business, the better the chance of it succeeding. The reason is because of many more years of work experience. You’ve made mistakes in the past. You’ve had success in other areas. I also think there’s a different mentality. The older you are willing to work harder to make be successful. If you’re young, you think if it doesn’t work, you’ve still got more chances to try again.

Want to make a career change? Why can’t you? You have experience in one career that your next employer would probably appreciate more than a recent college graduate who’s only learned from the book.

If you can’t find the career you want, why not create it? We live in a time when companies empower people to write bestselling books, be a Youtube celebrity, make money selling handmade goods, or even sell t-shirts without any design experience or inventory.

Again it’s the mentality that you’re supposed to have everything in your life figured out by a certain age. Once you choose, you can’t change.

Stop thinking that way.